When I was a child, we didn't have the internet at our disposal (yes, I am THAT old!!!). Thank God! The pre-teen and teen years contained enough angst as it was without having to worry about how many cyber-friends we had accumulated, or who had or hadn't liked our latest Facebook post.
Back then, if we weren't seeing friends every day, we either drifted apart or stayed in touch via the telephone or snail mail. Pen pals were a big thing, and there was always that moment of excitement when the latest letter dropped through the door. The letters were always lovingly written, giving great details of what had gone on in the writer's life since the last correspondence. It was a private missive, full of personal details, and showed a degree of care for the person receiving the letter. I recall that I would sometimes take several days compiling my 3 or 4 page letters to my pen pal. It was quite an act of dedication for an 8 to 10 yr old! When I was a child, up high on my bedroom wall was a small picture frame. The picture was of a small sailing boat in a sunset. But the picture wasn't the focus of the frame. There were words on that picture. Somebody cares... Somebody cares what a world of woe Lifts from our hearts when we really do know That somebody really and truly cares And that we are in somebody's thoughts and prayers And I want you to know And I feel that you do That somebody always is caring for you. Despite being all grown up with a child of my own now, I still remember those words. Caring... There is no greater wealth than the love and care of those who support us. And yet it seems to be a concept that is almost getting lost in the cyber-world that most of us now inhabit. It is all too easy to press 'like' on a Facebook post, and to tell all and sundry what we are up to on a day-to-day basis, without even breaking the stride of our day-to-day lives. Instead of increasing the opportunities to connect and make a difference in people's lives, the world of 'social networking' has almost disconnected us. If we allow it to, it has far more ability to strip us of our confidence, and remove our social interactions, than it does of building us up and reinforcing our support networks. When I was a child, my favourite holiday-time television programme was a show called 'Why Don't You...?'. Its theme tune sang something along the lines of: Why don't you...? Why don't you...? Why don't you... just switch off your television set and go out and do something less boring instead? So my friends, my challenge for you today is for you to make a special effort to switch off the 'television set' ... or computer, laptop, tablet, phone etc. Go out and connect with someone you maybe haven't connected with for a while. Show someone you care. Drop them a text, write them a personal email, compose a snail-mail, call them up on the telephone, meet them for coffee, give them a hug, reach out and touch someone's arm... Be human! You never know what a difference it can make to someone. It may enrich a good day, brighten a sad day, or be the glimmer of light at the end of a very long tunnel for someone. Go on... spread that wealth!
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My dear, long-suffering hubby and I have now been together for over 30 years, and married for more than 22 of them. Like most long-term relationships, we have had our ups and downs over the years, but have always stuck solidly together.
In the early days we bonded over our love of rock music and motorcycles - shared interests that drew us together and gave us 'stuff' to do together (beyond the ... ahem... obvious!!!). As the years went by, we discovered a love of the great outdoors, of hiking and climbing, kayaking, skiing, snowboarding, cycling and eventually running. With each new interest came a burst of new-found joy in our relationship... it refreshed things, if you like, gave us new things to do together. When we eventually got round to having our daughter, the love of these things were shared with her and once again we got to enjoy them all anew, through the fresh eyes of a new human being. I confess there are times when I could readily throttle Mr Wall, but I still love the very bones of him and long may that remain. My relationship with running has, in many ways, followed a path similar to that of a successful relationship. We first met at school, where we flirted with one another on and off for a few years before finally drifting apartf after the last exams were sat and life beyond the school gates beckoned. We saw one another as casual friends on a few occasions in the decade that followed with just the odd run for pleasure in that time. Towards the end of my twenties, I started to see running's attraction in a different way, and took our relationship somewhat more seriously. A few road races made their way into my agenda, and a few more, until by my early thirties we were pretty much going steady - a spring and autumn marathon, with 10ks, 10 milers, half marathons and 20 milers strategically placed throughout the year. It was a high-maintenance relationship demanding treading a thin line between peak performance and injury/burn-out - more than a couple of weeks away being repaid with stoney glances and 'serves-you-rights' from the scorning 'partner'. For the first half-decade or so of our relationship, interest was maintained by the variety of road races on offer and the desire to better my pace at all distances. For the last few years, interest has been injected and supplanted by a change to ultra-running, trail-racing and (latterly) obstacle course racing, adventure racing and running as a family. This is, to me, the key to me staying engaged with the sport that I continue to love more than 14 years into our serious relationship. Like any other good long-term relationship, life these days is so much more settled than those early days. Sure, we still have days when we hate one another, days when we want nothing to do with one another, even days when the time spent together would probably have been better spent apart, but these are surpassed by the comfort and familiarity that the relationship holds, and the joys that it brings. Deep down I know that it is always worth putting the effort into sustaining the relationship. I try not to resent the times when my runs are not so positive and dwell, instead, on all of the positives that running brings me: the 'me time', the health benefits, the weight control, the mental health pluses, the running friends (who are the best type of friends ever!!), the drive for self-betterment... the list goes on. Not to forget those very rare days (or nights) when I actually get to run with my husband. In my running, as with the the rest of my life these days, I find that when things go less than smoothly, it pays to have faith that it will all work out in the long run... Happy running my friends... |
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